“But we have only five loaves of bread and two fish,” they answered. “Bring them here to me,” He said. Then He told the people to sit down on the grass. Jesus took the five loaves and two fish, looked up toward heaven, and blessed them. (Matthew 14:17–19)

Over the summer, I joined a Bible study with a small group of women of all ages. Every week I showed up exhausted, overwhelmed, and running on empty. I wasn’t even getting the study questions answered. I was trying to be faithful with everything entrusted to me and somehow, I still came up short. I thought summer would give me extra time, instead my life picked up the pace. Even though I was prioritizing reading my Bible, I wasn’t studying it or at times living it out and I quickly became spiritually distracted.

Honestly, I don’t remember much from the study itself, but one question has lingered in my heart every single day since:

“What does a woman after God’s heart look like?”

You would think that after twenty years of walking with Jesus, I’d have a confident answer. I used to but the past year had drained me, taken more from me than I realized.

One week, I shared how busy and imbalanced my life felt. I wondered aloud whether I needed to let something go, or whether this was simply a season of pushing through the chaos with faith. Clinging to God’s goodness, trusting He could multiply my time, my capacity, and my energy.

Then one of the youngest ladies in our group, she was maybe 19 said something that me pause:

“I think it matters not so much what you’re doing, but how you’re doing it.”

Are you doing it for God? Are you acting in a way that honors him?

Her words were simple, but they surpassed wisdom far beyond her years.

I sat there thinking about my early twenties, when I was a new believer, on fire for Jesus, fresh from His healing. I had survived so much, and seen God restore every broken place. I was bold, confident, and unshaken. I felt like David facing Goliath: “My God, my God!”

But now, twenty something years later, married, raising three children, carrying scars, grieving from loss, walking through my children’s hardships, fighting to stay connected with my husband in the trenches of parenthood and… I realized how much life had changed me.

Her question gripped my heart:

Have I lost sight of my God, my “why”?

Have I been giving my chaos to Jesus or taking it elsewhere? Where is my focus?

What Does a Woman After God’s Heart Look Like?

Since that day, I have kept circling back to the question. And slowly, gently, God has been answering it.  A woman after God’s heart is someone who gives Him everything she has, even it is so little and watches Him multiply it.

Just like the five loaves of bread and two fish.

She shows up with a bold confidence that comes only from Him, even when she doesn’t have it all figured out. She loves when it’s hard, clings to hope when it’s messy, and embraces difficulty because she knows God’s promises can be trusted.

She isn’t perfect. She might cry. She might be late. She might show up without her homework done. She might feel like she only has “two fish.”

But she has freedom in the truth that God fills in the gaps, makes something out of nothing. She rests knowing God reigns over every limit, every boundary, every season, and that He is the One who multiplies what we surrender.

Maybe being a woman after God’s heart isn’t about having everything together, maybe it’s simply- Trust God with what you have, faithfully showing up even if it is with only two fish.

Dear God,

There is a woman reading this right now. She is tired and about to give in and give up, but I pray that you meet her where she is and remind her that you see her. You see all the inadequacies she feels she has but you love her anyway. Please encourage her to surrender her “two fish” to you today and bless it. In Jesus’s name I pray, Amen!!!